


Oxygen Narcosis

by Nope



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-04-03
Updated: 2003-04-03
Packaged: 2018-12-23 10:33:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11988009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nope/pseuds/Nope
Summary: Everything looks different underwater.





	Oxygen Narcosis

Everything looks different underwater.

Expelling the last syllable of his curse in a slow trembling bubble of air, Sirius watches lazily as the light expands and breaks from his wand tip, sliding up and away.

_(--and half a second before this they're still falling--)_

"Tachypsychia," thinks Snape and "The boats too small" and also of chlorine and Lily saying "it's like drowning" and, as his robes billow around his sinking frame, of brushes swirled in water, slow spirals of drifting ink and, briefly, James' hair on green silk sheets.

Sirius thinks suddenly of Lily, of green eyes and bedtime stories, of 'the Water Babies', of being washed clean, of his life melting away until only innocence remained, no guilt, no remorse, no memory, a child again, a child -- and, thinking of Harry, begins to struggle against the weight of his soaked robes.

_(--and two seconds before that, they're firing hexes at each other and two minutes before that, they're shouting about everything and nothing and the usual and two hours before that, they're pushing the boat out onto the lake--)_

Snape's anger is deliquescent; the further he sinks, the faster it dissolves, until nothing remains but an oddly euphoric emptiness in his skull and air burning in his chest. His wand slips easily from his fingers and he turns to follow it down into the darkness.

Robes are a complication but water in his fur is just as bad, and Sirius changes back, kicking through the currents that causes, twisting out of dank black fabric until finally, finally he's free to move, and he actually takes a stroke towards the surface before he realises that there is no sign around him of his enforced companion.

_(--and two months before that, Dumbledore is making them shake hands and two years before that, they think of each other properly for the first time in twelve years, with mutual animosity--)_

"Cyanosis," thinks Snape and "Anoxia" and of how their bodies will be found, of white foam in dead throats because the body always struggles no matter what the mind wants, of violent grasping and half moon marks in wrinkled palms, of lividity and bleached, bloated, waterlogged skin worn away by the constant churn of water currents, of wildlife feeding, of putrefaction loosening tissues till he's as liquid as the world around him.

Everything's heavy, there's a relentless pounding pressure in his skull and slow bass rumbles in the rising shadows, currents stir the distant dappled dregs of light, and Sirius puts his back to them and kicks down, hands down, sees movement, kicks, hands, finds himself amid air bubbles and almost swears till he remembers himself and kicks and sweeps and faster now because Snape isn't the only one running out of air.

_(--and back and back, boats on a relentless tide rushing down to the beginning, history in reverse, and Azkaban is cold and hard and Peter is a rat, Sirius is laughing and Harry survives and Lily dies and James, and Peter betrays and so does Snape and earlier the snake and skull burn themselves into their arms--)_

"Over," think Snape and "Done" and hears something like singing in his ears, blood noise, closes his eyes, opens his mouth to the cold, bitter deep and as he exhales the last of his air, the darkness reaches out to grab him.

Sirius has never before quite appreciated the sheer weight of water, pressing into his back, and just below he can make out swirling black framing sallow skin and something else, something large, like the lake bed has rushed up to meet him, and something like a dinner plate blinks and the word is on the tip of his tongue but he loses it in the panic of a whipping shape entangling itself around his legs and he's already frantically struggling before he realises that he can, impossibly, breathe.

_(--and Snape sneers at Lucius and Sirius laughs at Peter and James in charcoal kisses Lily in white and Dumbledore's making speeches and James is pulling Snape away and there's something at the end of the passageway, all fur and fascinating fangs--)_

His fingers burn as air rushes into his lungs and Snape's eyes open of their own accord to meet a flat gaze hiding alien thoughts, twist away and follow the green tentacles that surround him, that coil around him, a tightening spiral of rubbery flesh and sharp hooks that shred his clothes, traces the labyrinthine paths from himself down to the beast and up again to their other prisoner and Snape thinks "hell, this is hell" and moves.

Struggling just tightens the restraining limbs about his own Sirius quickly realises and relaxes into the embrace until it loosens, takes a deep breath, shifts to dog form and lunges towards Snape, expecting momentum to drag them both free, but Snape's thrashing about, pulling away, and before Sirius can correct his movement he's entangled again, tight in the Giant Squid's embrace.

_(--and Sirius is telling Snape how to get under the tree, and Snape is watching Remus cross the lawns, and earlier he is watching Remus walk away from the dungeons, and just before that he's watching Sirius and Remus as the last of the faintly yellow smoke clears around him--)_

Snape does not question why his panting isn't filling his lungs with water, nor the meaning of the tight grip around his leg and waist, just reaches for Sirius with clawed fingers, laughs wildly as the other man tries to swing a punch at him, the blow turned slow and useless against the weight of water, catches the offered wrist and yanks the other man forward.

The tentacles slide around them, pulling them into each other, pressed against each other and the squid, and Sirius spends a frantic half-second trying to remember if Giant Squids are man-eaters and then Snape's teeth are closing in his neck and he's too busy wondering if Snape might not be carnivorous as well and shoving back, breaks free of Snape only to be slammed back together again by the Squid and now Snape's hand is buried in his hair and his tongue is insistent against Sirius' parting teeth.

_(--and just before that Sirius and Snape are exchanging daggered glances from opposite sides of the corridor and Lily is saying something about gas, and just before that there's an arms length between them and matching disgusted scowls, and just before that there's barely a hands breadth between them and closed eyes and two voices saying "Remus?"--)_

Everything's covered in a fluorescent blur flicker and the greasy static feel of water magic and Snape's eyes on his are black, blank, empty things and his kisses are hard enough to hurt. Sirius, pushed up against him, feels heat coming off him in waves, feels Snape's heart beating too fast against his own chest. Feels Snape break apart, gasping for breath, and come back, licking trails along his collar bone. Thinks of Remus and trembling butterfly kisses. Thinks of James who kissed like it was a competition. Thinks of Harry. Of Snape and Harry. Of Snape's long fingers twisted in Harry's hair. Harry's eyes glazed, half lidded. Amidst the hot rush of guilt there's sudden tension coiling in his gut. He's hard and Snape's hand is right there like he knows. His own hands find their way through the tatters of Snape's robe, seeking flesh. Snape's sharp hips hump against him. Hands move on him. Feels tentacles slip and tighten. Feels everything move. Feels water rushing around them. Feels everything rushing and rising. Moans into Snape's mouth.

_(--and just before that there's no space between them at all, and just before that he's stumbling half blind in the dungeon and catches a hand where his partner should be, and just before that he's backing away from a spewing cauldron, and just before that--)_

Water rushing past. Everything getting brighter. Moving faster. Hot hands rubbing, pumping. Fingers in hair, squeezing skulls. Tongues fencing. Skin to skin. Moving. Everything lightening. Eyes clenched. Humping against tight fists. Squeezed. Pushing up. Up. Towards the edge. Pushing against. Surface. The edge. Breaking. Everything.

_(--just before, just, everything, all at once, a screaming explosion of rushing white and--)_

Darkness.

~

Water lapping against his bare toes brings Snape round. The world's too bright against his eyes. The pebbled beach's too rough against his skin. The tatters of his robes, still soaked, cling slimy to his skin. He's alive. He half rolls over, coughing, and stops at the sight of Sirius crouched there on the beach. Sirius, who is naked and glistening, still half hard and staring at him, rubbing his lips over and over against the back of his hand. Snape tries to sit up and Sirius yelps, stumbling back and up to his feet. He hangs there for a moment, on the edge of something, of speaking or perhaps some vast, invisible cliff, then breaks. Three strides from Snape and he shifts, hitting the ground running, a black dog bounding away. Six strides, twelve. Fades, swallowed by forest.

Snape pushes himself to his feet but only gets as far as his knees. His hands fall back down to the pebble shore. His breath catches in his throat. His hand falls. Again. Slams into the pebbles. Smashes his fists down against the shore, down again, again, over and over. Still punches down even as the stones turn sticky red and the dull ache in his knuckles surges up his arms, explodes into hot needles in his eyes and black fire in his brain.

Sliding back down into the cool depths, the Squid's tentacles sadly wave goodbye.


End file.
